FAQs as answered by the Cats of Pussweek
Is this a real book? Yes.
Is there stuff inside or is it just a blank notebook with a HILARIOUS cover? There's real stuff inside (see our about page). 100% original content. No blank pages. If you want to write/draw/poop on something, do it somewhere else. You can roll around on Pussweek, though. Feels good, man.
When is the next issue coming out? When we're ready. We're cats, what's the rush?
Why is it called Pussweek if it doesn't come out every week? Pussweek is a play on words. If you don't know what it means, we can't help you.
Is there an electronic version? Only for Issue One. E-books are no fun to sit on or chew so we don't make them.
Can I write a story for Pussweek? No. It only has one author, so that's like asking JK Rowling if you can write a chapter in Harry Potter (though comparing Pussweek to Harry Potter is supremely unfair - Pussweek is light years ahead of old Harry and his flaccid wand).
I'm a special cat. Do you want to do a story about me? Maybe. Get in touch via our contact page and we'll have our humans talk to your humans.
Can I be on the cover? No.
Why not? The title of Pussweek Cover Cat is a prestigious honour which comes about by invitation only. If it helps, pretend the cover is the MET Gala and Bexy McFly is Anna Wintour. If you ask, you're immediately disqualified.
But what if I never get asked? You're either uggers, we haven't seen an interesting photo of you, or you're just not on our radar. Follow us and make yourself known. But don't be desperate. It's not a good look for a cat.
P.S. We already have a list of carefully selected cover cats in waiting, and since we release roughly two issues per year, you might be dead by the time yours comes out.
OMG Why don't you do a dog version of Pussweek? OMG you can call it WOOFWEEK! or PUPWEEK or DOGWEEK! Please die.
Why does international postage cost money? We don't have time to educate you about the inner workings of the global economy and why humans refuse to work for free, but basically that sh*t ain't cheap. We do our best to wear many of the postage costs ourselves, but if you're still unhappy you might wanna take it up with the humans at the post office. They like it when you bite them on the leg.
OMG don't you know what PUSS means?! Uhh, yes. And if you don't know, you probably shouldn't be reading Pussweek. Also, if you're at all unfamiliar with innuendo or puns, you definitely shouldn't be reading Pussweek. Also, if you have a bug up your ass about anything at all, or are easily offended, just gtfo.
Is Pussweek educational? No. And while we're on the subject, Pussweek is not recommended for kittens. There are a few swears.
Can I get it in a different size? What? No. It's a book, not a collar. It's always been (and will always be) the same size, give or take a few pages.
Do you sell subscriptions? Nope.
Why Not? Despite appearances, we're not an actual magazine. We're a colourful, cleverly disguised book. And we hate commitment.
But I want to buy my friend a subscription! We have lots of gift packs and options available, and they're wrapped very nicely.
Where is Pussweek printed? We have two printing stations: one in Australia and one in Canada.
I have a shop/cat cafe/veterinary hospital/rescue. Can I sell Pussweek to my customers? Heck yes. Get in touch via our contact page and we'll make it happen.
I want to be a sponsor and/or donate to this wonderful operation. Can I please throw lots of money at you? Yes.
I want to advertise my product in Pussweek. Can I? We're pretty picky and we have very strict guidelines, but if you think you can handle it, get in touch via our contact page and we'll have our humans talk to your humans.
I have an event coming up - can Pussweek be a sponsor? Yes! We are proud to help out any cat rescue organisations wherever we can - be it with freebies, goodies, discount coupons, publicity, or our time and skills. We also love attending events to raise money for cats in need. Get in touch via our contact page and we'll make it happen.
Will you please do a story about an event we have coming up? Have you read Pussweek? We're not a magazine or local newspaper - we're a book, a parody, and we're big on inappropriate comedy. We can talk about you on our social meowdia channels, though.